Because of Camp...

The American Camp Association celebrates its 100th year in camping next month at our annual national conference in Denver. The theme of this monumental conference is “Because of Camp….”

I took a few moments to think about that phrase and what it means to me as a one time camper/assistant counselor/counselor/odd-job woman/ridge leader and now program director of the place which has so intimately shaped me over the last 24 years.

Because of camp, I journeyed over 600 miles away from home without my mom, dad, sister or pets…when I was 12.
Because of camp, I realized I WASN’T exactly like my mom…I LOVED horses.
Because of camp, I overcame the grade school taunts of “duckie” “pudgie” and climbed a 14,000 foot mountain…11 of them, actually.
Because of camp, I made friends who were more diverse, interesting, opinionated, and different than my friends at home.
Because of camp, I appreciated my strong legs, ability to carry a heavy pack, and the admiration I earned from my friends and counselors for being a little kooky.
Because of camp, I remembered odd facts about odd things at odd times…did you know that the dust on aspen bark has an SPF of 4?
Because of camp, I had role models who took time to know me, laugh with me, share themselves and their lives with me.
Because of camp, I found out I was truly an alto…or maybe a tenor.
Because of camp, I decided it was easier to ask for permission than to beg for forgiveness.
Because of camp, I felt grace and true harmony for the first time.
Because of camp, I watched women eat…and eat…and eat…because eating together was a celebration and a communion—celebrating all the hard, physical work we had done together.
Because of camp, I figured out that experiences are more valuable than things.
Because of camp, I learned how to be a leader by simply being myself.
Because of camp, I accepted responsibility for mistakes I made, and altered my path to avoid making the same mistakes again.
Because of camp, I watched hundreds of unique sunrises and sunsets…and remember every one.
Because of camp, I know what it feels like to genuinely believe in someone so strongly, that she feels like she can do anything.
Because of camp, I understand the power of women to both tear down and to build up…and, at camp, there is a lot more building up than tearing down.
Because of camp, I listen to triumphs and heartbreaks with thoughtful ears, and not a boastful mouth.
Because of camp, I see a uniquely, personal gift in each Colorado blue-bird summer day…and the other 300 campers, 120 staff, and 59 support staff feel the same way.
Because of camp, I am a better mother, wife, and daughter.
Because of camp, I have become the woman I always wanted to be.

Now, your turn.

Because of camp…..

Role Models: A Longer Look

Mirriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines a role model as “a person whose behavior in a particular role is imitated by others.”

The key word in this definition in imitate. Imitate. Who do you imitate? Who is your role model? Really think about it. Depending on your age and what’s going on in your life, your answer is probably very different from others. If you’re five, you might say “your parents.” If you’re seven, you might say “your classmates.” If you’re fifteen, you might say “Shaun White.” If you’re twenty, you might say “your professor.” If you’re thirty, you might say “your spouse.”

Throughout our lives, we have many different role models who we imitate, and when we grow to a certain age, we can choose these role models. When I think of whom I imitate, I’m reminded of a lecture that really stuck with me in college about Social Learning Theory. “The theory considers that people learn from one another, including such concepts as observational learning, imitation, and modeling. The basic principles of Social Learning Theory are as follows:

1. People can learn by observing the behavior of others and the outcomes of those behaviors.

2. Learning can occur without a change in behavior. Behaviorists say that learning has to be represented by a permanent change in behavior, in contrast social learning theorists say that because people can learn through observation alone, their learning may not necessarily be shown in their performance. Learning may or may not result in a behavior change.

3. Cognition plays a role in learning. Over the last 30 years social learning theory has become increasingly cognitive in its interpretation of human learning. Awareness and expectations of future reinforcements or punishments can have a major effect on the behaviors that people exhibit.

4. Social learning theory can be considered a bridge or a transition between behaviorist learning theories and cognitive learning theories” (http://teachnet.edb.utexas.edu/~lynda_abbott/Social.html).

According to this theory, a person’s social environment has a huge impact on the general behavior of the individual, both positive and negative. When I search my mind for positive environments for children, I can’t think of any better environment than sleep-away summer camps. At camp, the community structure gives children a chance to observe the behavior of many peers and role models and the resultant “reinforcements or punishments” of those behaviors. And you may think well they can get that at school. Same thing, right? Wrong. School settings model only a learning environment, where as summer camps, especially overnight camps, model everyday life, from meals to personal hygiene practices and beyond. Moreover, summer camps offer the best role models for children; role models that you can really know; role models that are personal and intelligent. These role models are the counselors, who typically have a few years of college experience and who are screened for their character and ability to work with children. I don’t think that a parent could ask for anything more from a role model for their child to imitate.

And just a side note followed by a rhetorical question: I recently searched the phrase “modern role models” on Google. The first ten individual names that popped up were Shaun White (snow/skate boarder), Soulja Boy (hip hop artist), Miley Cyrus (teen pop artist), Matt Damon (actor), Michael Jordan (legendary basketball player), Chris Angel (magician), Noel Gallahgar (musician), Tyra Banks (model and talk show host), Angelina Jolie (actress), and Britney Spears (musician). Although all of these people are involved in different careers, they have one common characteristic: they have exposure through mass media – television, radio, Internet, magazines, and newspapers. They are celebrities. They have had great success with their individual careers. But how well do we really know them? We see them in their “roles” – on the slopes, on stage, on the screen – and we can imitate them only in the role that we see them. Shaun White is a role model for a young snow boarder. Soulja Boy is a role model for a young hip-hop artist.

But are these people you want acting as role models for your children, siblings, students? Miley Cyrus was just ranked one of the worst role models for teens. Just because someone is called a role model, does not mean they are setting a great example. You have the opportunity to give your children strong role models through their social environments.

Who is your model for the role of parent, brother, sister, student, employee, leader?

Summer Camp Comes Home for the Holidays

With the holidays fast approaching, we thought we might take a “program idea” from former camper Jackie Hatfield and the recent Wall Street Journal article “Summer Camp Comes Home” that profiled her new Idaho home “Camp Hatfield”. The home was envisioned by her husband, Tinker Hatfield, a top Nike designer and Sanborn camp parent, with many touches that are inspired by Sanborn Western Camps.

Recently Tinker and Jackie invited friends and family to live, work and play together in their camp style home. As the quintessential program director, Jackie assigns “staff” to programs, dish duty, and more while “campers” sign up for the different daily activities offered around the property.

We think this is a GREAT way to organize a large group of friends and family who are coming together to celebrate the holidays…and an economical one, too. You can take the mystery out of “what are we going to do today, Mom?” or the worry that, perhaps, the chosen activity for the day (say, bowling) may NOT be what your 93 year old great grandmother had in mind for her afternoon. Plus, you can share the cost of meal planning and preparation, gas, and—in some cases—you might even qualify for a group discount!

A few tips for creating an effective holiday family camp program:

1. Create variety: On a daily basis, have at least three activities to choose from that will take a similar amount of time but appeal to different age groups. A cookie decorating/baking party for the kids (followed with a costume dress-up “tea” afterwards); a “Last Minute Mall Crawl” for final holiday shopping (take your highest occupancy vehicle—or even consider renting a van for a few days); and a nature walk/bike ride/park excursion for high energy individuals (read: young boys) and others who just want to be outside. We recommend always having some sort of outdoor activity going on—this gets folks out of the house, reconnecting with nature and the elements, getting some fresh air and sunshine, and is a low-cost, no-cost activity. For ideas of what to do once you GET everyone outside, check out the 101 Nature Activities pdf.

2. Utilize your resources and share your gifts: have a number of family members who live in the same town? Find out what they can/want to offer as activity ideas. Perhaps you have a cousin who could take a group fly fishing for an afternoon, or a grandmother who is a docent at the local art museum, or your own child who wants to lead a tour of her favorite parts of the community zoo. Setting up a board game station or a “daily craft” table in the basement will also provide some activities to do during transitions or down time. If everyone is meeting in a unique location, send out a link to the town/city website and ask folks to find activities that look interesting to them...assign staff accordingly.

3. Make a job wheel: For families all coming together under one roof for a few days, a job wheel is a great way to assign tasks that will make the host/hostess feel less overwhelmed, and help the guests feel like they know what they “can do to help” without having to ask constantly.

The job wheel can either be designed for family groups (“Plan and prepare dinner” “Kitchen clean up and dishes” “Pick the movie for Movie Night” “Breakfast Buffet” “Put Out/Take Down the Sack Lunch Fixings” “Tidy Common Areas”) or for individuals (“Sweep Kitchen” “Toilets/Toilet Paper Monitor” (makes sure toilets are clean and all bathrooms have toilet paper on the rolls) “Eco-Freako” (last person out of the house who makes sure all the lights are off, heat is down, and doors are shut) “Trash & Recycle Fairy” (makes sure trash is emptied and recyclables end up in their proper containers) “Happy Hour Hostess” “Weatherman/Coat Patrol” (this person makes sure all little people have all the things they need for the day and are in the proper attire…this might need two slots on the job wheel.) A job wheel makes mundane tasks a little more fun, and a little less overwhelming!

4. Food, Outcamp and Able Waiters: This is what makes the holidays fun…and STRESSFUL. Utilize a job wheel (#3 above) and/or have simple breakfast/lunch spreads that can be “self-serve” or even packed “outcamp-style” with all of lunch for 8 packed in a crate to be served and eaten at the zoo/park/children’s museum/mall food court/hiking trail/etc..

For big dinners, consider trying out non-traditional holiday themes (“Candyland” was a big hit with the campers this summer…but probably wouldn’t work very well for your vegan, sugar-free sister-in-law) to provide opportunities for creativity, excitement and COSTUMES. At our house Thanksgiving means bringing and eating foods which we are thankful for—and pizza is ALWAYS on the menu. Antsy kids can take the job of “able waiters” who clear the table after meals—and they can be paid in “chits” for doing a good job. Chits can be redeemed for all sorts of great rewards (ice-cream party, “first-turn” privileges, “treasures” from a treasure chest, etc.) and provide a fun incentive to help all week/weekend long.

5. Big Evening Events: Pictionary games are legendary; a bag-skit night can be even more so. Create mixed age groups and give them a sack with an assortment of random things—each group then comes up with a skit in which everyone participates using ALL the items from their bag. Themes of “Our Favorite Part of the Week” or “Holiday Happenings” or “What Might Happen If…” will help family members overcome stage-fright and the dreaded “skit-block”. Sing-a-longs, a moon-lit night-hike around the neighborhood (or neighboring woods), and—of course--roasting marshmallows for s’mores in a backyard firepit, the fireplace, or even the fondue pot (FINALLY you get to use it for something!) are great family-friendly events that will create memories for years to come.

6. Create “Camp” Traditions: Family style dining, announcements, singing, costumes, celebrating the everyday, sharing in the successes of others, being grateful and thankful for your friends and family—sounds a little like the holidays, too, right? Make sure to give everyone ample opportunities to share “highs-lows” or their favorite part of the day or something they learned and who they learned it from. With camp-style activities, family members may not be together during the day, so it is important to reconvene and share stories, laughter, and thanks. A great treat is a “Praise Jar” where family members can leave notes of appreciation and thanks to each other—and at the end of the week/weekend, those notes are distributed to each person—a more meaningful gift than anything that could be purchased at the mall.

The most important thing to remember when planning a camp-style program of fun and adventure for your friends and family this holiday season is to be flexible—who hasn’t had the impromptu infirmary in their basement because cousin Alice suddenly came down with the chicken pox on Thanksgiving morning?—and to channel your inner camper. Kids rarely know how much preparation and work goes into a fun, nature-filled, activity-rich day at camp…they just know it was a great day. So don’t stress, let others help, and don’t let the “teachable moments” get lost in the desire to execute the plan. The kickball game at the park dissolves when the 7 year old outfielder discovers a wolf-spider den in the grass? See if you can catch the fly that brings him out of his lair.

And, no matter what happens, it will be a holiday celebration everyone will remember for YEARS to come. We hope the Hatfield’s have a fantastic holiday season at Camp Hatfield, and that your holiday season is as joyous and fun-filled as a day at camp!

The Zen of Camp

In a nod to our good friend, Marla Coleman and her blog Campfire Stories for Parents, I thought I would feature one of my favorite children’s books, Zen Shorts, by Jon Muth. It often takes zen-like patience and wisdom to work with children in the camp environment, and this collection of stories provides three key nuggets of life wisdom which can be applied to almost any situation working with kids OR adults. The quotes interspersed with the commentary are from Sanborn campers.

Our narrator in Zen Shorts is Stillwater (a giant panda), who first tells a tale of a robber attempting to steal from his rather material-poor uncle. The uncle (a polar bear, of course) startles the robber when he offers up the clothes on his back—the robber takes the clothing and runs. Moments later, while looking up at a beautiful full moon, the uncle laments, “All I had to give him was my robe…I wish I could have given him this beautiful moon.”

The beauty of a camp experience is that kids actually DO get the moon…and the stars…and the trees…and an understanding, appreciation and wonder for the natural world. At camp, and in the outdoors, our days and actions are “stripped” to the necessary and the functional. There is not a great deal of material excess or concern, so campers and staff alike find it easier to begin to look outward: to connect with the natural world and with each other.

“There is something about Sanborn and the mountains that is unattainable anywhere else on earth. The greatness of the landscape humbles you and makes you grateful for life at the same time.”

Similarly, in the second tale, we learn of a farmer who seems to have both a great deal of both bad and good luck. His horses run off (bad), and eventually they return and bring back some wild horses (good luck); his son tries to ride one of the wild horses and breaks his leg (bad luck), and then the army recruiters arrive to enlist young men to fight in a war, but they see the son’s broken leg and pass him by (good luck). In each instance, a bevy of well meaning neighbors stop by to offer their sympathy (“Such bad luck!”) or celebration (“Such good luck!”) to the farmer who always replies, “Maybe.”

During the summer, it appears easy to see something like a missed summit or a conflict in the living community or getting lost on a hike as a failure—or just bad luck. In actuality, the missed summit builds anticipation, desire and strength for the next climb; the conflict allows us to look at our communication and group living skills; and being lost teaches us how to deal with adversity, anxiety, and a lack of control. The opportunity to work in environments so rich with diverse growth opportunities isn’t rare—it is just a matter of perspective. Unlike some potentially less forgiving environments, at camp when we think we have “the answer” there is both the vision and the challenge of “…maybe.”

“The mountains are a place where you can forget about the congestion and commotion of city life and focus on what life really has to offer.”

My favorite story is the last. Two monks are passing through a flooded town when they see a rather cross-looking woman who is waiting for her attendants to carry her across the water-filled street. The older monk quickly picks her up, carries her across, and sets her down—only to have her shove him away without a bit of thanks. The younger monk stews over this woman’s rude behavior for the rest of the afternoon and then finally berates the older monk for even picking her up because she was obviously such a terrible person…a statement to which the older monk replies, “I set that woman down hours ago, why are you still carrying her?”

So who are WE carrying today and why? A month may seem like a long time, but for our campers it passes like a heartbeat—and, no wonder, this place and the people here create their own energy and life rhythm. There isn’t time or space for holding on to slights or hurt feelings or drama—there IS time and space to work through those challenges in a healthy way and move on. Our campers and staff who understand that letting go of whatever hinders them (negative perceptions of themselves or others, bad choices in the past, family issues, etc.) are able to grow limitlessly during their time at camp.

“I am coming back to camp because I have more and better friends here than any other place on earth; each summer is an adventure, and each summer I push myself farther.”

Indeed.

The Deluge and Resulting Growth

A fun poem a staff member wrote last year:

Most people break

When you put their lives at stake

But the ones who grow up

Through adversity are great…

 

CRACK! CRACK! BOOM!

 

The lightning screamed

As it shook us in our jeans

Which were wet and soaked through

Like our packs and all our things

 

We hung our heads and dreamed

Of a place that’s warm and green

But the sky was cold and blue

And the sun was all but seen

 

We were wet and we were cold

But determined, we were bold

So we lifted all our chins

While our horses heads hung low

 

“Sissy horses”, I was told

By a child who wasn’t old

And he shot at me a grin

Only grown folks hold

 

The grin made me feel warm

In that fearsome, awesome storm

For the man in me had quit

And my spirit all but torn

 

“Just go home!” it warned

On our backs the hail was thorns

Then I saw my men’s teeth grit

Oh, the leaders in them born

 

In that aspen grove we sat

While the rain drops hissed and spat

But we drank ‘em one by one

And we kindly tipped our hats

 

“Thank you for the pat

Of rain upon our backs

For we cannot love the sun

If we haven’t first felt that

 

We asked Miss Nature, “Please!

Will you put our will at ease

We feel like we are stumps

That are old and long deceased

 

The rain and lightning ceased

So we got up off our knees

And as we all stood up

We were taller than the trees!

 

Most people break

When they put their lives at stake

But the ones who grow up

Through adversity are great

Hooray for Camp!

For the past week, our staff has been happily inundated with information. They have participated in Wilderness First Aid classes, taken CPR/First Aid and lifeguard training courses, gone on a two day backpacking trip around our incredibly green and wildflower-filled 6,000 acres, taken horseback rides, flown down the zipline, climbed rugged Pikes Peak granite, learned facilitation techniques, learned about the homesteaders and the Ute Native Americans who once lived on this land, practiced tools to work with children, and realized a great deal about themselves.

Tonight we played “How Well Do You Know Your Co-Counselor”—a game show style activity that highlighted some of the trivial facts one can learn about someone in the course of a few short days. Questions ranged from “Coffee or tea?” to “What is your co-counselor’s biggest pet peeve?” The laughter, constant conversation, and sheer number of right answers demonstrated that this group of staff is as committed to each other as to the campers they will be working with beginning Sunday.

I recently read a quote that said, “You can learn more about a person in one hour of play than during a year of conversations.” I believe this is true. I also believe you will learn more about yourself, too. Because these women and men have chosen to work and play together with children this summer, they will take away many growth lessons from their time at Sanborn Western Camps.

Some will be lessons of triumph, perseverance and celebration. Others will be lessons of missed opportunities and some regrets. As I spoke to a senior staff member tonight, she said that she knew that supervising and mentoring her peers would be challenging, but she hadn’t realized how much of the process would require looking at herself through a more focused lens. She said she has already had moments when she wished she would have done something differently, made a different decision—and the look on her face told me that she isn’t used to “failing”.

But this type of growth isn’t failing—it is trying. Research shows that kids who are given encouragement for their efforts tend to work harder, and longer, to succeed than those who are given praise for their successes and intelligence. Feedback becomes easier to give and receive when individuals are accustomed to feeling good about what they have learned from a given situation—and when they are asked “what would you do differently next time.” Because, in the end, in this great laboratory of human relations that is camp, and IS life, there will always be another opportunity to try again.

So we will spend the summer playing, learning, and growing together—and, because of these moments, these men and women, and the boys and girls they will work with for the next three months, will be on the path to become the happy, balanced, thoughtful, caring, wise, successful, nature-loving, objective, empathetic, inclusive, strong, and productive adults the world needs them to be.

Hooray for camp!

Charlotte's Web and Camp

I love reading children’s books. I enjoy their simplicity. I appreciate their genuine realness. I respect their innocence. I am amazed how much they say and how much they can affect and teach their readers.

Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White is a beautiful story of friendship, loyalty, and miracles that occur when people care for and believe in one another. As Mr. Zuckerman’s pig, Wilbur grows, it becomes evident that he’ll have a limited life expectancy – that is until Charlotte, a barn spider, declares that she’ll be his friend and create a way for Wilbur to become special to others. Charlotte accomplishes this by weaving messages about the “terrific” pig into her web. As all the other barnyard animals join in the plan, one realizes that amazing things really are happening. They believe, respect, and support each other. 

At summer camp, amazing things happen all the time. Just as with Wilber and Charlotte and the rest of their community, connections are made. Soon new friendships are formed – every camper is known, needed, and cared for. When someone makes you his or her friend, you soon become beautiful to everyone. Campers are special people: kind and patient, encouraging and loyal.  Sometimes we don’t know where to look, yet every day during a camp season, we realize that life gets better because each of us are in it.

What's In A Name? The Evolution of a Movement

What makes a trend? Where is “the tipping point" when the obscure becomes the mainstream? How do we collectively determine what is important to us as a global culture? And when are we called to action? The “green” movement has undergone a transformation from years of “grass roots” and individual efforts, to a widely discussed topic throughout all media sources and one that people are acting on in a broad way.

As we move ever closer to the beginning of the summer camp season, I am seeing a refreshing trend in conversations across the web. News outlets, bloggers, parents, summer camp staff and other professionals in the outdoor industry are talking about the importance of nature in the lives of our kids. By consolidating our voices, our message, our vision, and (maybe?) our name we can achieve a simple and very important goal: to get our children reconnected with the natural world.

The Children In Nature Network, Richard Louv, the ACA, and the National Wildlife Federation are some of the larger organizations and better known individuals providing momentum to the children in nature movement. Yet, in the current environment of lightning-fast information exchange through blogs and on social media platforms, the conversation is just as loud—if not louder. I wanted to share some of the lesser known groups and individuals I have found who are also doing their part to spread the word about the importance of authentic, nature experiences for our kids.

The blog at PlayOutdoors.com has an outstanding post regarding the “outdoor play movement” which details specific ideas to make getting outside with kids a habit, not a rarity. Another name for the movement is “free-range kids”—where parents are giving up their hovering, helicopter ways for an experience-based approach to childhood (imagine that!) which encourages problem-solving, independence, outdoor play and personal resilience. The Free-Range Kids blog and book by Lenore Skenazy hopes to “give our kids the freedom we had without going nuts with worry.” The Nature for Kids blog provides articles and resources for parents interested in becoming a part of a community of parents who detail just HOW they manage to get their families outside regularly. The Grass Stain Guru celebrates the messes, dirt, and experimentations of childhood, while Play Everything is an offshoot of the need for unstructured free play in the outdoors. There are even blogs—such as The Outdoor Parent —designed to celebrate the importance of the outdoors in the lives of children AND their parents. The Green Hour, from NWF, is yet another direction (another name) the movement has taken—just an hour a day of “outside time” will make a difference in the lives of your children. Urban parents who don’t have the opportunity to take hikes in the backcountry will really appreciate the tips and ideas for enjoying and appreciating nature in the city (podcasts are even available to download and listen to on your morning commute!)

Children In Nature. No Child Left Inside. Nature For Kids. The Green Hour. Free Range Kids. Outdoor Play Movement. Playwork. Free Play. The movement is multi-faceted, multi-dimensional, and based on these blogs, global. As long as the dialogue continues, then we will all learn to speak a common language—and one that will benefit the planet, relationships, our children, and the overall health and humanity of our global society.

Remembering My Camp Experience

My horse is 750 pounds. My saddle is 40 pounds. I am 85 pounds. My own skeleton barely supports me. Added to the 40 pounds of saddle, and transporting it 30 yards under my own power has become a daunting challenge. I think to myself, “a 200 pound wrangler would have to carry a saddle that weighs 95 pounds to match my ratio. My horse would have to carry 390 pounds to match it as well.” Luckily, this isn’t my first time carrying this saddle. See, this saddle belongs to my favorite horse, Thunder. I’ve carried this saddle numerous times to him and heaved it up on his back. By the way, his back is a good foot and a half taller than me.

I remember my first few days with Thunder and how he must have seen my wrestling matches with this saddle. I could barely carry it out the barn, let alone over to the hitching rack where he stands waiting, patiently. I could barely carry it then, but now, I toss it around like nothing. All I did that summer was climb rocky bluffs, walk up and down hills with my backpack, paddle my canoe across lakes, summit mountains, tube down rivers, and swim to the shore... all fun stuff. I didn’t lift the saddle every day, practice carrying it, or lift weights. Hmmm… I remember the carrying technique my wrangler suggested. He showed me the way that he did it and it seemed to make sense. He helped me the first week of camp and I gradually got the hang of it. The awkward shape and dangling pieces were much more manageable with his technique, and it became easier.

Now that I have overcome the saddle conundrum, Thunder is waiting for me. He’s patiently tied at the hitching rack, brushed and groomed, and ready for our final ride of the summer. I grab his saddle and walk, if not strut, to him. I gather my saddle pieces and toss it on his back. I know Thunder is impressed. He’s my favorite horse and we’ve become good friends. I started riding him when I first got to camp. Being from Chicago, I didn’t know much about horses, but it always excited me to be around them and to ride them. I started out learning to brush, saddle, and bridle my horse. My wranglers were great teachers. I looked up to them. I saw their confidence and it inspired me to do my best to learn and ask questions so that maybe I could be that confident with horses. As the repetition and practice of saddling and bridling became habit, we moved onto riding. Riding was spectacular. Little did I know that Thunder would be such a great teacher. Our first ride was too short in my opinion. I could have ridden for days. Thunder was strong and controlled. On our first overnight horse trip, we bonded. We rode all day to a sweet campsite; a great view, cool sunset, good food cooking on the fire, and all my friends around me. I wondered if my friends had the same feeling I did about my horse.

As I mentioned before, my other camp adventures took me to new places with new people to new heights, literally. I learned how to rock scramble, build survival shelters, identify animal tracks, and that I could climb 14,000 foot mountains. My confidence grew. I capped off my summer riding Thunder in the Gymkhana competition event against the girl’s camp. I can’t believe how much I learned in one summer, how much I learned from a horse. While I have since gone on to ride many more horses, Thunder will always hold a special place in my heart. 

Off The Beaten Path

As the last of the 24” of snow melted this week, I took a walk with my young sons in Olin Gulch in celebration of Earth Day. My four year old gleefully kicked slush at the dog in the two-track for a while before declaring his desire for “my own trail” and then setting off at a 45 degree angle from the main valley. Mom, infant brother, and wet dog followed.

As we walked, we identified tracks from ravens, rabbits, Sula (dog), ground squirrels, and even the tracks of a cross-country skier. And then my son stopped. “Mom. Look at THESE tracks.” I wandered up to where he was standing, staring down. “They are big,” he said. And they were. So I asked my standard question, trying to be cool and nonchalant, “So what do you think made these tracks?” No pause. “A bear.”

I agreed.

With all of our efforts to manage trash daily with off-site contained recycling and a bear-proof compactor, I haven’t seen much bear activity or bear “sign” around the ranch since my return to camp in 2001. But here was a set of perfect tracks in the snow; a post-winter, slightly pigeon-toed, long-clawed lumber headed straight toward the pond in the valley.

Awesome.

In the hour walk that followed, we kept talking about the bear—wondering where it lived, what it had been eating, and—of course—its size. We also talked about why we don’t usually see, or see signs of, many big animals or predators around anymore. We talked about habitat loss, weather changes, and our impact. With a four year old, when the conversation gets too heavy, suddenly he starts pretending he is a whale diving or a motorcycle jumping a ditch—but today was different.

He asked a lot of questions—hunting was a subject that both distressed and fascinated—but, at dinner that night, his favorite part of the day was, “The walk—and the big bear tracks in the snow.”

The slogan of my youth was, “Earth Day…Everyday.” And every day that we can get our kids, the Sanborn summer camp crew, our local school children, our country as a whole OUTSIDE, the more likely each individual will be to have a deep, authentic experience or interaction with the natural world. It is the best way we can create passionate stewards of our wild places; trying to do it through technology is a weak—and distancing—substitute.

Could we see bear tracks online? Yes. Could we watch a show about bears on Animal Planet? Yes. Would my son have run into his preschool classroom the next day and immediately told his teacher about “the really big bear that walked down to get some water after it slept for a long time and probably went to look for some bear berries or maybe some dead animal but not people because bears want their own space away from people because people hunt bears and I don’t like hunters but I like bears but they’re big….”? Probably not. And even though his teacher could only understand about 1/8 of his rambling story, she nodded and said, “I like bears, too. I want them to be around here for a long, long, LONG time.” And my son? He just smiled and said, “Me too.”

Mr. Smith Goes to Camp?

I don’t watch TV much but the other night one of those old-fashioned movie channels was playing “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington” and it caught my attention. I couldn’t believe that I had never seen it before. After all, I’m one of those retro people who watches “It’s a Wonderful Life” every December. I know all the characters, every plot twist, every line and still tear up when Clarence gets his bell.

 

So, I was casually watching Jimmy Stewart when I was electrified by the fact that he was introducing a bill in the Senate to create a summer camp. (OK, to be honest, he was proposing a “Boys’ Camp” but that’s forgivable because the movie was made in 1939—I’m sure that today he would be proposing a “Girls’ Camp” too.) I watched in amazement as he identified the skills and ethics the boys would learn at camp and pitted them against the corruption, greed, and dishonesty in Washington. And then he engaged in his heroic filibuster (really, who besides Jimmy Stewart could make a filibuster heroic?) based on the highest ideals of America.

 

As I thought about it later, I realized that maybe things have not changed so much in the 70 years since Mr. Smith Went to Washington. Summer camp still stands as an antidote to the dysfunction and partisanship of many of our political systems. The goal at camp is to build a community based on respect for everyone, an appreciation of diversity, honesty, and teamwork. The goal at camp is to learn to appreciate the natural world and to interact with nature in ways that leave no trace. The goal at camp is to challenge ourselves together and to achieve great things like climbing mountains or camping in the wilderness. The goal at camp is to help young people to learn the social and emotional skills, which will help them to become happy, ethical adults.

 

Is it possible that if every politician had a camp experience as a youngster, the tone and attitude in Washington would be more functional, civil, bipartisan, and inclusive than it is today?

Sanborn In the Snow

Ranch Manager Sam Carkhuff was clearing some of the 24 inches of snow we received this weekend for the cattle and horses out at Witcher Ranch. When it snows this much in April...all we can think about is summer camp!

Camping to Parenting: The Top 10 Things I Have Learned as a Summer Camp Professional That Make Me a Better Parent

Part II

The second edition of the two part series about skills I learned while working as a summer camp youth development professional at Sanborn Western Camps. These top five are, in my mind, some of the most important tools to practice...but they are also some of the hardest parenting, and counseling, skills remember. In the end, if we screw up (which we will), a genuine apology, a good hug, and time spent together in the outdoors will make the challenges and bad feelings evaporate--and give everyone the room they need to breathe. Enjoy!

5. Respect their individuality. Making comparisons between children (siblings, bunk mates) is a terrible mistake. Very few of us deliberately say things like, “I wish you could be MORE like Alice…” but plenty of us are guilty of saying, “Look at how well Alice cleared the table…” with the sibling or the rest of the children filling in the end of the sentence, “…and YOU didn’t.” Appreciate each child’s unique gifts. Know each child’s unique gifts. Celebrate those gifts in a one-on-one setting, don’t put one child on a pedestal in front of any others. Don’t love equally, love uniquely.

4. Never forget: It is the ACTION, not the person, you need to modify through discipline. There are no “bad kids” only “bad choices”. It is hard to emotionally remove yourself from a situation that has you incensed…but you must. That said, it is equally essential to voice your feelings, “We all have been working as a group to stop gossiping about other campers, because it is very hurtful and damaging to our community. The rumor that you started IS hurtful and damaging. You are not a mean girl, you just made a bad choice and I want to understand WHY you made that choice.” Tantrums (pre-school or pre-teen) are an outstanding time to practice empathy, not judgment.

3. Kids need time to simply be themselves. To simply be kids, to simply be playing, to simply be silly, to simply be curious, to simply be grumpy, to simply be happy, to simply be thoughtful, to simply be alone, to simply be playing with others, to simply be outside, to simply be strong, to simply be scared, to simply be human. Never underestimate the power of unstructured free play in the outdoors—kids will learn more about themselves and others in that environment than during a lifetime of soccer games. Boys, mine especially, really love taking long walks outside while singing silly songs, running races, picking up pinecones, inventing games, and actually talking to their momma.

2. The ability to manage and control one’s emotions effectively is a trait that many happy, wise successful adults all have in common. Providing children tools to practice emotional management is vital for creating a healthy, well-balanced society. A parent’s job is to raise a child that she wants to “release” into the world…and to begin that slow release the day the child is born. Beware of enabling behaviors that seem like safe alternatives. Make challenging situations into positive learning experiences. Promising a homesick child she can come home if she “hates camp” before she even arrives strips her of the ability to work through a tough experience and be proud of the resilience she developed on her own is no different than promising candy if you can make it through the grocery store without a fit.

1. 80% of what children hear and learn is what they see. Humans learn through mimicry. Kids will only be as good at these skills as you are…and parents, camp counselors, and camp professionals should never stop trying to do these things at home, at work, with friends, and with family. Because, in the end, children will see all of you faults, and love you anyway.

If you are interested in more tips from the camp world about parenting, preparing your child for camp and for life, as well as some cutting edge conversations about youth development, please continue to visit the Sanborn Western Camps blog--and also check out Bedtime Stories for Parents and parent resources on the ACA website.

Camping to Parenting: Top 10 Things I've Learned as a Summer Camp Professional That Make Me a Better Parent--A Two Part Series

Part I

I love summer camp. Being a camper, being a camp counselor, being a camp director, being a parent—I have made summer camp a part of my life and, now, part of the lives of my children. That said, it is remarkable how quickly you forget some of the cardinal rules you learned while you were a 20-something summer camp counselor about working with kids when your own children are in mid-meltdown about the shark show that “Daddy promised!” they could watch if they ate all of their mixed veggies. Sigh.

In order to help me regain my sanity, I have compiled a list of some of the most effective tools I have found for working with kids in the summer camp (and home!) setting, whether the kids are mine, yours, your sisters’, your neighbors, or “that kid” from down the street. I would love to hear from wise parents, youth development professionals, and other summer camp believers about kid-centric tools and techniques you find have worked for you. Since this is a two-part series, you may see some of your ideas in the next post.

10. The Power of Choice: Give kids real decision making opportunities by providing them with choices you can live with (i.e.: Do you want to clean the toilets before or after you make your bed? or What are your goals for this summer camp session? Do you want to climb a bunch of mountains or do you want to ride horses? Or Do you want to help mom set the table or do you want to make the salad for dinner tonight?). By doing this, you empower kids to take responsibility and ownership for their own actions.

9. Allow kids to define their own boundaries; facilitate the boundary creation. Give them ways to “frame” things in the positive: We’re going to the zoo today, what SHOULD we do at the zoo? We SHOULD stay together, we SHOULD wait our turn to look at the otters, we SHOULD have lots of fun. And what SHOULDN’T we do?.... “RUN!” “Eat too much candy!” “Feed the lions!” “Cut in line!” “Talk back!” You quickly learn that many children, even very young ones, have a great understanding of right from wrong…and by “framing” activities before they even begin, they can more readily “own” their actions and are more willing to respond if they accidentally do something they SHOULDN’T do.

8. If conflicts do occur, make kids right about what they need to be right about. “She hit me first.” “Yes. I saw that she hit you first. Why did she hit you, do you think?” Also, in heated situations, never make assumptions. Ask A LOT of questions and remember that most kids WANT to do the right thing…but sometimes they just forget how to do it. Don’t put kids in a box that they can’t get out of—during conversations, as they are growing up, socially, etc.. A great technique for getting a kid to talk is to MOVE. Children, especially boys, can have a hard time expressing their feelings if they feel like an adult is standing there, waiting for an answer, and “pressuring” them to say something. If you can remove the child from the situation and go for a walk (ideally outdoors), the questions you ask may elicit more than the standard, “I dunno” answers.

7. When they make bad choices, assign real and timely consequences. This one takes practice and you have to know your children or campers very well in order to assign a consequence that is neither too harsh nor too lenient for the action. I will often make sure I—with the help of the kids--have “framed” the entire experience so any resulting “bad choices” already have consequences assigned (i.e.: “We decided as a group that people who don’t help with clean-up today won’t get to have any of Emily’s cake after clean-up. SO…is everyone ready to win cabin clean-up today?”). That also takes some of the emotional volatility out of the situation. If everyone knows what will happen and when, I am not perceived as being arbitrary or unfair.

6. Give them plenty of opportunities to practice making both good and, inevitably, bad choices. Give them a safe framework to practice in…overnight camp is an outstanding, safe place to practice decision-making. Overnight camp provides a community with multiple supportive adults who genuinely want each child to have an outstanding camp experience. Through their interactions with other adults and children, who may or may not have similar interests and experiences, kids learn how to make and keep friends, practice perseverance and resilience, and gain a better understanding of themselves…all of which helps them become wise decision-makers.

Next time, Part II! I look forward to hearing your thoughts….

Children and Nature

April is Children and Nature Month, sponsored by the Children and Nature Network and we hope that everyone will join us in celebrating.

At camp, we have long known that magical things happen when children and nature get together. Now there is a growing body of research that supports the importance of a strong connection with the natural world for all of us, and especially for young people. Richard Louv's book, Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder, includes research from many sources and this documentation all points in the same direction. "As one scientist puts it, we can now assume that just as children need good nutrition and adequate sleep, they may very well need contact with nature."

What does contact with nature provide? According to Louv and the research he cites, nature calms children, focuses them, and yet excites their senses. It incites peace and curiosity at the same time. It provides physical and emotional exercise that "is more varied and less time-bound than organized sports." It reduces stress and bolsters children's resilience. Louv further points out, "Children are simply happier and healthier when they have frequent and varied opportunities for experiences in the out-of-doors."

While camp is an excellent place for children to experience a personal connection with the natural world, it is certainly not the only place. Children can experience nature in alleys, backyards, and school grounds. They can find adventure and discovery while playing with peers in a vacant lot or park. Or they can gain a lifelong appreciation for the natural world by spending time with an adult who knows how to point out the animal sign and notice the color of a leaf, and then support the child in making his own discoveries. As Rachel Carson said, "If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder...he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in."

How will you share Children and Nature Month with the young people in your life?